You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
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