She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
Isis wins if we don't have the loudest, kinkiest sex in every part of my house tomorrow
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Randomize
