i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Yeah, I'm pretty glad I chose you to have drunken, sloppy birthday sex with.
That's the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me
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