Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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