Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
i had to flash a cab last night.
did it work?
No. he slowed down but then kept going. story of my life.
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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