Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I just haymakered a dude with my face, can we talk about ME for a second and not the guy I fought?
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.