North Korea, Best Korea!
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
If I make it home without being sick in this captain's hat it will be a fucking miracle.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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