WTF. you left me with no condoms and you ate all my mac and cheese. scumbag.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
I miss you, too. It's hard to sleep without anything licking my head.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
On a scale from 1 to banned, how offensive do you think it would be to wish my vibrator happy Valentine's Day on various social media outlets?
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
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