Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
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