Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I told him the only reason I'd sleep with him is if we have a threesome because I'll need moral support
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I mean, he’s listed as “Andrew DC Threesome” in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize