you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
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