nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I dropped a piece of Mac and cheese in the shower and I almost still ate it. Stoned, but not stoned enough to degrade myself.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
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