So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Found out my brother is now my eskimo brother...One of my proudest times as a brother
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Well I just put wine in my tea
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Randomize
