Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
For an hr, you were convinced you no longer had a right arm so you played Super Mario Bros with just your left hand vs Beth. You won btw, mite b why she refused to wear the unicorn head
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
