Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
I think his parents are learning english from the phrases I shout during sex.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
I need to see you idiots before I go back to school. But we shouldn't snort Crown Royal this time.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Randomize