You're completely useless in the revolution.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
THINK! exactly how many raw eggs did you color and hide in my apt.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Randomize
