matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
