I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Randomize
