Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He broke up with me because "we're at different points in our lives" I think it's because he saw a drag queen with their hand halfway down my pants
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
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