Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
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