Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
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