I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I'm going to a foam party and gonna grind someones dick off hayy
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
I basically spent the entire weekend in bed with that red head.Every time I tried to leave she got me too horny to think straight. I was kidnapped by vagina
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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