is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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