he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
the "happy anniversary" cake for my mom and dad is about to turn into the "yeah, that's a hickey, welcome back from italy" cake.
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize
