My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
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He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
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