The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
Randomize
