He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
It was darkish out, I was shit faced, and they should have marked the electric fence a little more clearly. The entire wedding reception saw me run full force into it
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
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