So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
