Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
you haven't felt a hangover until you wake up after a night of snorting tequila.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
Well if it makes you feel any better I threw up at Roadhouse. And then on the way to the train. And then in a water fountain. And then in a plastic bag on the train.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
It is no longer St. Patrick's Day. I should NOT still have green boobs!
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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