I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I'm sorry for not being sorry about whatever shit I did to you when you were annoying and I was drunk. That is all.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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