My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
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