First day at work... I clogged up the office toilet on purpose to assert my dominance.
I hope to God 2011 is the year I stop loving tequila.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
She said I'm like warm bathroom-sink water. There's nothing necessarily wrong with me, but she doesn't exactly want to "drink me in"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I think people are normalizing furries
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Randomize