no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
Randomize