U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
I just walked in on my dad beating it.. There's not a fucking therapist in ARKANSAS that can help me with that!
I imagine you as a cat holding your burrito with two paws and cutely eating it
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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