i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
Just thought you should know that your brother tried to febreeze his floors with cooking spray last night.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
