I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
Randomize
