Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
I had perfectly good intentions but my penis had other ideas and now I need a place to crash what do you say
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