She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
I told the bartender that he could give me back the tip I gave him if he outsmarted me in a battle of wits. He has yet to challenge me.
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Pretty sure the cab driver can even smell the sex coming from between my legs
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
As if I wouldn't steal Nintendo brand "Mario is my HOMEBOY!" boxers when he gave me the entire drawer to choose from.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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