Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
What happened to fro yo and sex?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
