I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Thanks for stranding me with th douchebag award recipients
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Some chick just barfed in my math class. Everyone here is hungover. Yay community college
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
