he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
please don't call me when you're wasted. i don't feel like having any other future arguments at 3:18am about how to hang up your phone. you have a flip phone, you should know regardless of how fucked up you are.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
