OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
