Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
Sorry for yelling at you, I'm just really emotional about missing comicon.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
