Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
My night sucks. It's really hard to masturbate with a broken finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Randomize