oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
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It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
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I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
i woke up this morning with a fake eyeball in my pocket
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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