I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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