I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
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