Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Well the bottom line is that I had to completely coat my testicles in Neosporin.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
When he pulled out it sounded like a balloon deflating
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