if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
Ok fine, yes she's pregnant. But you're ignoring the most important part. HER BOOBS GOT BIGGER. That doesn't happen every day, and I owe it to myself to enjoy those boobs before the belly catches up to them!
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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