i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
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Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
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We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
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